5 THINGS TO FOLLOW FOR BETTER COMMUNICATION SKILLS

In today's world, communication is very important.

Basically, there are 4 types of communications - verbal, non verbal, written and visual.

But here in this blog, i will talk about the verbal communication, the communication which we do almost everytime, the act of speaking, talking and interacting with others. That's what this blog on communication skills is all about.

If you are interacting with people in day to day lives, then communication is the first and foremost thing that you need to make attractive. If your communication power is strong, then anyone can listen to what you are talking about, anyone can feel what you are saying, anyone can have keen interest in what you are talking about.

Some people that are doing jobs, running their own businesses, doing services also think that they have time management skills, leadership skills, but somewhere they are lacking in their communication skills.

Communication is not only about conveying or transferring information from one place to another but it is an act of listening and understanding what others want to say and then reacting accordingly, not forcing and putting your opinions to others.

If you are good at communicating with others then you have a skill at which anyone can get attracted to. 

So here i am listing 5 things to follow while communicating that can be helpful to you from your personal life to your professional life. These tips can also be followed in a group communication or a two way communication.

1. Develop a learning attitude : 

Practice listening more to others and you will begin to learn something about them and about yourself too. 

Most of the people have a habit of only teaching or explaining to others through talking. They don't learn or listen what others want to say, they always act superior in front of them. This sometimes makes the people aggressive in front of them. For example, if your friend is talking about a course he/she had learned recently, and you have almost or lumpsum half of the knowledge about that course already and you both are talking about that course. Your friend is explaining to you that in first unit of that course there is XYZ (just assume for the example)... Before your friend moves forward in this topic, suddenly you are interuppting him/her that in the first unit there is ABC...not XYZ. Your friend denied what you were explaining. And you are continuously arguing with him/her on that topic. Eventually, your friend will get aggressive, he/she doesn't want to discuss with you on this topic anymore. This happens because you are not a good learner, you are not paying attention to what your friend is explaining, you are not learning what your friend is saying, you are interrupting your friend in between before listening the whole topic, may be your friend is saying something new about that course that you didn't know. We always learn something from a person. Even if you are more educated from the person in front of you, still you will learn something from that person while communicating. So always learn something from what others want to say (except the people who talk insensible) and then give your views.

2. Listen : 

While communicating with someone, always first listen what the person is willing to say. Many people don't listen to what others want to say, but they are so excited to tell them their own opinions and their views. But the main thing is if you want to talk about yourselves, or about your stories only, no one is interested in that unless you are listening to them. 

Some people also ask unnecessary questions in between the conversation before listening them completely, this also loses the power of conversation. People only listen to them who listen and understand to their talks. 

Just jumble the word LISTEN, we will get SILENT. It means that there is silence involved in listening. To listen something, we have to be silent first, not interrupting or talking in between. Two people cannot speak together at one time, if it happens then no one can understand what they are saying. So, while communicating patiently listen to what the person want to say and be a good listener. 

3. Feel : 

Some of the people while communicating are like just listening, they are not feeling what the person is saying. For example : Someone is talking to you and you are not paying attention, you are quite but you are lost in your own world. This lack of attention during communicating is also a negative point. Whenever a person communicates with you or talks about something, feel their words, their emotions. By feeling the conversation you can understand more deeply what the other person wants to say. We can't understand the emotions of a person unless and until we are feeling their talks. By feeling what the person is saying, you can give better reactions, better responses and better advices to them in return. So feel the conversation deeply and try to understand what the other person is saying or going through a situation. You can also put yourself in that situation in which your communicating partner is talking about to feel it deeply. From this you can understand the communication better.

4. Understand : 

Communicating is not all about exchanging information and giving back answers to what is said. The problem is we don't listen to understand, we just listen to speak.  A popular quote also says that - Think before you speak! Because we don't understand the situation and we are so curious to just give the answers. For better responses, first listen the person carefully and understand what he/she is trying to say. Try to understand their emotions, their feelings, their way of speaking, understand their tone of voice, listen to the emphasized words, ask for clarification if you are not getting it then confirm the topic that is going on but after listening the whole thing. Your mind can give you better answers after understanding the whole conversation. It is also said that a better understanding builds a good relationship. This is because the two people not only listen to each other but understand one another deeply, understand their situations, understand their emotions, feelings, even their talks. Therefore, to build a better communication understand the person and his/her convo properly.

5. Decide to speak/not to speak : 

Everyone needs a turn to talk and express themselves. If someone is always talking, the other person will eventually shut down and then start to avoid being around him/her because it is irritating and exhausting. So do not speak out unnecessarily. And also some people change the topic in between conversations because they do not have the proper answer or response of that. Do not change the topic in between, it can only give the reactions that you don't want. For example : If you go to a shop to purchase a particular thing. You asked for the product XYZ(just assume) and the shopkeeper gives you the product ABC, you already said that you want XYZ and the shopkeeper keeps saying that purchase this ABC product, this is better than XYZ product. And it keeps going on. Then what will happen? Eventually you get irritated and and exit the shop. May be later on, you will never enter that shop because of the shopkeeper's behaviour and the way he/she is forcefully changing the topic. 

When you have understood properly what the person the saying, then you can act accordingly whether it is a topic that makes you angry, whether to be happy, joyful or whether it is a topic of grief. When you have understood what the person wants, you can decide what to say or what to give or what not to say. Sometimes there is also a situation where being silent is the most effective thing to do, as take for example : Fighting. Being silent in a fight can reduce the anger in the person front of you, you can rebuild your relationship with that person while being calm and cool. 

And also it is best to remain silent when you have nothing meaningful to say, your words will only carry a value when you have some sensible thing to say, as senseless talks are always annoying to everyone.

*That's all for today's topic. Hope you will like this and follow something for your communication skills because communication works for those who work at it!*